David Heinemeier Hansson

People who make lots of little bets on many potential unicorns have christened themselves angels. Angels? Really? You’ve plucked your self-serving moniker from the parables of a religion that specifically and explicitly had its head honcho throw the money men out of the temple and proclaim a rich man less likely to make it into heaven than a camel through a needle’s eye. Okay then!


Angels are merely the entry level in the holy trinity of startup money. Proceed along the illuminated path and you’ll quickly be granted an audience with the wise venture capitalists. And finally, if your hockey stick is strong, you’ll get to audition in front of the investment bankers who will weigh your ability to look shiny just long enough until the lock-up period on insiders selling shares is up.

And guess what these people call that final affirmation: A LIQUIDITY EVENT. The baptizing required to enter financial heaven. Subtle, isn’t it? Oh, and then, once you’ve Made It™, you get to be reborn an angel and the circle of divinity is complete. Hale-fucking-lujah!

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